Zaskoda

It’s Monday. It’s almost 11:30pm. It was a crazy weekend. You might know the kind: where you don’t have a moment to spare. Nino and I overbooked ourselves. We took the extra time we needed from what would have been sleeping time. Sleep deprived and physically exhausted, Sunday night was probably the closest we ever came to really getting upset with each other. It wouldn’t have mattered, we were too tired to fight about anything.

Unfortunately, last night was restless at best. Work came early in the morning. After work I got to rest my head for about 40 minutes and then ran off to evening class. I called Nino to say good night as soon as I got home.

Once I hung up the phone, I realised I was finally “done” with the day’s responsibilities. It was about 10pm.

I knew I needed to go to sleep… but I thought I’d check the news. Then I looked at some of the projects I’ve been working on – but haven’t gotten to in a while. Suddenly I found myself editing style sheets and playing with logos. Now it’s 11:30 and I’m writing this stupid blog post.

I’m exhausted, but I just don’t want to go to bed. Tomorrow I have to wake up and go back to work. As soon as I go to sleep, it’s over. I feel like those videos of puppies and kitties where the little guys are fighting as hard as they can not to fall asleep. This is dumb, it will only make work that much harder tomorrow.

I do this a lot. I’m not managing my time very well.

I get 24 hours a day. Of those, 8+ are going to my employer. With an hour for lunch and an hour spent getting ready, driving in, driving home, and winding down – that’s 10 hours a day. Now toss in 8 hours of sleep and that’s 18 hours of the day gone. That’s 6 hours a day left to manage.

Laundry, cooking, cleaning, paying bills, and all those little responsibilities cut deep into that 6 hours. It seems that if I hit the grocery store on the way home, put produce away, cook dinner, eat, clean up the dishes, and retire to my bedroom – it’s nearly bedtime. Meanwhile, I’m trying to make time for the gym, dance classes, martial arts, climbing, and yoga during the week.

Of course, the weekends are often wonderful. One day nearly always goes to snowboarding. This is very nice. Still, we only get 52 weekends in an entire year! When you let one slip by quickly, it’s a reminder as to just how precious each and every weekend really is.

I’m having trouble letting go… trouble letting go of the freedom I had a month ago and trouble letting go of tonight.

*yawn*

Yup… it’s over.. time to sleep… can’t… fight.. any… more…

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